Popular Science just posted their newest ranking of the hottest tech toys out there. The coolest of which is the blood pressure checker connected to an iPhone app. It gathers data over time, looks for trends in your Uncle Jim’s blood pressure, and can email the results to his doctor; hence removing the “bloody” pressure of you having to drive your Uncle Jim to his doctor’s appointment in the first place (“Hi doc it’s Jim, I’m ready for our Skype check-up now. Yes, I’ve inserted my iPhone rectal camera … wait … let me just get rid of this one little thing … There, I’m ready to go!”) There’s also the digital pen that can somehow translate your chicken scratches into comprehensive data and transfer your shitty handwriting into real words and send them straight to the Google cloud. I’m picturing your doctor prescribing your chubby hillbillish Uncle Jim with some rectal medication that he’s writing with his Google pen in his illegible doctor-like handwriting. Then there’s the Sifteo gaming cubes which can communicate with each other and can be used in conjunction with any compatible downloaded game. I’m seeing your Uncle Jim in the hospital because the Google pen screwed up the digital translation (and the prescription) and poor Jimmy accidentally put the wrong shit up his poo-poo. Good thing you got him the Sifteo cubes because he’s going to have a good couple weeks of playtime available as his intestines are rebuilt. And don’t be surprised if Dr. Screwup needs to borrow your blood pressure checker when you serve him the malpractice lawsuit. To read the list of the Top 12 newest gadgets just head over to Popular Science.
